How should a Christian see sex education

Tom, Aydan and Finn from the third throw a "F * dich" at the head of the school secretary. Eight-year-old Elias pushes a doll between the legs of a classmate - to where the children come out. Lisa is annoyed by Mia and Meryem while doing handicrafts: "I, the lid of your glue looks like a condom!" Also in the third grade there is a piece of paper with which boys ask each other to test their courage: "Pinch Medchen in the breast" and "Sexuel harassment". A clique of girls keeps chasing individual classmates into the boys' loo. And Rocco from the second boasted that he had watched porn on the smartphone: "If you stick your penis in your butt hole, no children will come."

Really, is that what elementary school students do? Yes, the examples come from three primary schools in Hamburg, they were collected in discussions with teachers and parents. To protect the children, their names have been changed, and the schools and teachers remain anonymous. No school is in a focal point, the parents, with and without a migration background, are committed, and parents' evenings are well attended. So normal schools. Are the sexually charged sayings and actions also normal?

"These are examples of behavior that transgresses boundaries," says sex educator Annika Arens, "but it is normal for children to want to orientate themselves with regard to sexuality in the world." By the third or fourth grade at the latest, they are busy with their bodies, with questions about pregnancy, childbirth and gender roles, explains the expert from the Pro Familia Hamburg advisory center. Teasing and angry, even with sexualized language, are part of psychosexual development. "Sometimes boys annoy girls and vice versa because they want to set themselves apart and at the same time feel drawn to one another."

The dynamics differ from child to child, from class to class. While one class can rock itself up when experimenting with sexuality and language, the other class seems to be completely unaffected. Regarding the examples from the schools, Arens says: "It depends on whether a child wants to intentionally harm with his behavior. If that is the case, it needs a ' stop'and consequences, so that it changes its behavior. "It is different when children try to attract attention by using sexuality and language to show how grown up they are." Often, however, they do not know the meaning of the words , then an explanation from adults is necessary, "said Arens.

Using the F-word or terms such as "porn", "penis" and "vagina", children can hit classmates violently and cause adults upset or embarrassment. How do schools deal with this? What limits do they draw to children who test themselves and others? The problem: there is no clear answer to the question, because too many schools have no concept for this. In the case of "F * dich" to the school secretary, the boys had to be picked up by their parents immediately, discussions with parents and class council followed - signs both internally and externally that the limit had been crossed. But the reaction can also be different, too strict, too lax, too one-sided - or nonexistent. In any case, sanctions alone are never enough, stresses Arens. In order to sensitize children to respectful interaction, the situations have to be discussed and classified. However, teachers often find it difficult to react to the situation in everyday school life.

Sexual education hardly plays a role in teacher training

Anja Henningsen, professor for sex education at the Christian-Albrechts-Universit├Ąt zu Kiel, also blames the education for this. "Sex education is at best a marginal issue at many universities." Henningsen's courses for prospective teachers and educators are, however, in demand. "A signal that they find it necessary to deal with it."

This is not always the case with teachers on the job. In one of the three primary schools in Hamburg, a teacher explained to the parents that the topic was not mandatory. The Federal Constitutional Court confirmed in a landmark judgment in 1977 that sex education is part of the state's educational mandate.