What does ghosting mean in dating
The phenomenon of ghosting - reasons and tips for sudden loss of contact
Your date has suddenly disappeared without a sign of life and no longer contacts you? Everything was fine between you yesterday. They wrote happily to each other and had a great time together. But that is over now, because your date is as if swallowed by the earth. Then you are unfortunately in theGhosting trap tapped. Ghosting is one of the worst ways to break up with someone and is anything but the fine kind. We will show you now how you can defend yourself against an end without saying goodbye!
What is ghosting?
In principle, ghosting is nothing new, it has simply established itself as this concise word over the years. Ghosting means that Your date simply breaks off contact and is no longer heard from. As if disappeared into oblivion, it feels as if the other never existed. Almost everyone has been one at some point Ghosting victim has become or has used the ghosting method. An abrupt immersion is not so rare in the dating phase, but it gets even worse when it happens after a month-long relationship.
For many people who have fallen victim to ghosting, it feels like you are Carpet torn from under the floor become. You are left sad and wondering, “What went wrong?” Or “Am I the reason?”. To Sadness and Self-doubt comes the Anger, which needs to be brought under control. You need to learn to deal with the loss of contact and often cannot change the situation - the problem is the ghost!
Why do people ghost? - the 4 most common reasons for ghosting
Ghosting happens for a variety of reasons. We have the 6 most common motivations of men and women summarized for you:
1. Insecurity and lack of self-confidence
The simplest reason for this is clearly your own uncertainty and a missingSelf-confidence. Ghosting is easy - just block the number and the contact, delete friendship on Facebook and Co. - done. So quickly someone can be struck from life and you don't have to face the other person and seek a conversation. Why should you also bother to explain to the other why the contact was broken off or what the general problem is? No more feelings or someone else is involved are just a few possible reasons.
2. Ghosting out of cowardice
In addition to a lack of self-confidence, the cowardice a possible rebuff, or quite harmless no interest. One would think, if there is no interest, that this is also communicated that way. Sometimes the chemistry is just not right, which is perfectly fine. A short explanation should be given anyway.
3. Fear of commitment can lead to ghosting
For some, the reason for “ghosting” is also a strong form of Fear of commitment. These people may dare to let someone into their lives for the first time in a long time. But then it becomes too much, the fear of attachment becomes so pronounced that the ripcord is pulled and before the conversation can take place, people with attachment anxiety split off consistently and abruptly. This has absolutely nothing to do with you, because the fear can only be overcome by the people themselves and that takes a lot of time and work on yourself.
4. They were just having a secret affair
In order to see the whole thing from the other side, there is of course the possibility that you only have one affair have been. The actual partner got wind of it and issued an ultimatum - the decision against you. This is of course very painful and before the ghost loses his actual relationship, he prefers to break off contact with you, because the long-term partnership takes precedence.
6 tips on how to best deal with ghosting
Gosting is a really nasty dating trendwhich you should definitely not participate. However, if you become a victim of ghosting yourself, these 6 tips can help:
1. Accept the situation
The biggest mistake you can make as a ghost victim is chasing after the perpetrator. Don't overwhelm him with messages, emails, and phone calls asking what you did wrong. Whoever ghosts someone else does not deserve to be fought for him.
2. Direct yourself from
Sure, such a break in contact hurts a lot at first, but life goes on. The best thing to do is to distract yourself with something nice. How about a spontaneous weekend trip, for example? And when was the last time you had a really nice wellness day?
3. Write one last message
A End of class is always good for your ego - write a short but stylish final message to make a dignified exit.
4. Don't become a ghost yourself
If other people are too cowardly to end the contact appropriately, then there is nothing you can do about it for now. But you can do better yourself! GAlways treat others with respect and tell them what you think and feel.
5. Gain new confidence
A sudden break in contact with someone who means a lot to us can seriously damage our confidence. Don't let that get you down and make yourself clear: someone who just lets you sit there doesn't deserve you!
6. Don't forget to trust yourself
Ghosting always means a breach of trust. Someone has offended you very much and of course that leaves wounds. But don't forget: the next partner who comes and means well cannot help your bad experience.
In this way you can prevent a sudden loss of contact
Unfortunately, you cannot completely prevent someone from suddenly breaking off contact with you. But if you keep a few simple things in mind when looking for a partner, you can prevent the nasty dating trend:
- Don't let false hopes arise and always stay clear and direct.
- The first meetings are not going the way you would like? Stay without obligation and don't let in so many emotions before hurting yourself.
- Avoid standard phrases like "We should definitely repeat that!" if you are not serious about it anyway.
- The date is not for you? You just can't find a common denominator? Isn't it bad at all just be honest and you will appreciate it.
Conclusion: honesty lasts the longest
Nobody can prevent ghosting, however, everyone has the opportunity to to act actively and to take care of it, always to speak honestly and openly. How many dates have you already had? How many partnerships have you entered into that then turned out to be nothing? You often don't find great love the first time, but you should be fair to the other and have the courage to say if something is wrong - or if it just doesn't fit.
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