How do we decide what to dream

Do we have to live our dreams?

They seem to be everywhere - but they are particularly present in relevant magazines and on social networks. We're talking about people who live their dreams. And by those who live their dream by explaining to others how to live their dreams. I love my dreams and I don't want to live without them. The question, however, is: does that mean that I absolutely have to want to live it?

Dreams: daydream, escape fantasy or compass?

We all have our small and big dreams, which according to various surveys are often very classic. Health and financial security. Find the man of the heart. Start a family. Travel the world or emigrate right away. Win the lottery and buy your dream home. But maybe we also dream of a life as an artist who is at home on the big stages of this world or of finally writing a novel. Dreams can have different faces, say the psychologists Brigitte Boothe and Clarissa Pinkola Estés, among others. Sometimes they are our little oasis, sometimes the compass that helps us to achieve our goals. Every now and then, however, they resemble a sticky mass that keeps us trapped in the realm of dreams. That is why we would do well to look closely at what kind of dream we are dealing with.

  • Daydreams and wishful fantasies:

    Sometimes our dearest dream is never meant to come true. Because we prefer to retreat there for a few minutes in everyday life to draw strength and recharge. Instead of the comfort chocolate, we treat ourselves a little mental cotton candy. We dream away with relish and then tackle the next task strengthened. Daydreams are like a little vacation for the brain and for the soul, which we can confidently enjoy if we don't lose ourselves in them permanently.

  • Escape fantasies:

    Other dreams lull us. As soon as it becomes difficult or uncomfortable, we take refuge in our dream world and fantasize in front of us. And not only in every free minute, but also when spiritual presence is required in order to actively improve the situation. In dreams we have achieved everything that seems to be worth striving for - in reality we sit dreaming through the problems on the couch. And the tougher and more colorless life becomes, the more dazzling and intense our dreams become. These escape fantasies, as Clarissa Pinkola Estés calls them, may feel comfortable for the moment,however, prevent us from actively approaching our lives. However, escape fantasies can contain important clues about what we are missing in life - so let's take a closer look instead of just dreaming away.

  • Compass:

    Directional dreams release energy and bring movement into life. We become more awake, more attentive and we get great desire to finally try out what we have dreamed of in reality. Maybe we buy books or courses, browse travel guides or scour the Internet and soak up all the information that can help us achieve our dreams. We become active and feel that there is still a lot in our life that presses for realization. And these are by no means just big dreams that turn our previous life upside down and force us to leave our job, family or place of residence behind. Sometimes it's the little ideas that make our hearts leap as soon as we just think about them.

If you can dream it ...

Sometimes there is a fine line between wishful fantasies and fantasies about escaping. But if we don't lose ourselves completely in our dream worlds and neglect reality, there is nothing against it if we treat ourselves regularly to an excursion into the realm of dreams. And maybe we also have the fun of writing an outrageously long wish list that nobody but us gets to see and that we take with us into our dreams. Yes, we are grown up, realistic through and through. And quickly push aside anything that seems unrealistic, selfish, or greedy. But who says that life can't be a dreamlike request concert? Because as did Walt Disney:

"If you can dream it, you can do it."


Whether we really want to live our dreams - and which ones - or whether they can just sweeten our day, only we can decide for ourselves. However, it is worthwhile to get to the bottom of our favorite dream fantasies. You could be the beginning of something wonderful. Even if it's just that they bring us a wonderful daydream that will bring a smile to our faces for the rest of the day.

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